Sad

Today I'm sad. Nothing to do with the past couple of weeks and the death of someone I loved, liked along with a few other deaths. Deaths that I cannot comprehend, deaths that have taken tiny pieces of my heart. Today I am sad for myself. For lost things, for lost loves. Today I cry silently inside and try to smile it all away. Today I can acknowledge how lonely I get in the middle of my incredibly filled life. Today feels like so many yesterdays, yesterdays I thought that I had escaped forever. Today I can see that no matter how much love I get, I can still feel unloved, unheard, unseen. Today I see it is me that is at fault for dreaming that it could be any other way.